Sound of Madness

Today is a lyrical type of day. So instead of writing my own thoughts.... Here you go. It is how I feel about God today. I want to be in love with him as much as I am Dan. To be completely overwhelmed with worship. Lifehouse. Everything. Find me here, And speak to me. I want to feel you, I need to hear you. You are the light, That's leading me, To the place, Where I find peace again. You are the strength, That keeps me walking. You are the hope, That keeps me trusting. You are the light, To my soul. You are my purpose, You're everything. How can I stand here with you, And not be moved by you? Would you tell me, How could it be, Any better than this? You calm the storms, And you give me rest. You hold me in your hands, You won't let me fall. You steal my heart, And you take my breath away. Would you take me in, Take me deeper now. And how can I stand here with you, And not be moved by you? Would you tell me, How could it be, Any b

I've been reading a blog of a dear friend of mine who passed away. It saddens me to read how amazing she was just by how she lived her life. What a true testament to how a wife and mother should be. In light of recent events, the movie theater killings, it puzzles me as to why good people who make a difference die. While the jerks of the world get to live and cause havoc. It makes me really want to dig in and be a better mother. Granted I have little time left, as they are getting older. But I do love my kids more than life itself and on any given day would give my LIFE for them. I guess that is why it's so hard to see them struggling with teenage problems and rebellion. I want the best for them. I want to see them happy, yet thriving and being an asset to this world. I long to see them make a difference. I can see Jesse inventing things, engineering something, and of course serving our country. I see Wade opening up a surf shop, traveling the world, ziplining, and

What every parent strives for is to have their child be the best they can be. To have a child that loves and respects you. A child that goes to school and lives a normal healthy and happy life. Gets decent grades, goes to dances, has nice friends, gets a job and a car, and prepares for their future as they walk with their class proudly in cap and gown. There is a glitch in the system. I have made huge mistakes in my life. Mistakes that I, myself, have asked forgiveness for. Now those mistakes are now rearing their ugly head. The regrets I have are many. Even more so now that my son is going down a destructive path. I feel as though it is my fault. So now I have to accept the role as the "mean" parent and take everything away. I can handle him hating me for now, as long as it's not forever. What needs to be done, needs to be done now. Time to clean out his closet. New friends, new hobbies, and new attitude. If this doesn't work, then Job Corps it is..